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24 stories in this section.
After years of fuel prices doing acrobatics, Lagos traffic defeating GPS, and passengers demanding Lekki-to-Ikeja comfort at “my guy abeg” rates, Uber may have finally discovered Nigeria is less a market than a practical exam in suffering.
Nyesom Dwala
In Nigeria’s content economy, even a boxing deal can collapse without anybody throwing a punch, as goodwill, Instagram Stories, and old grudges enter the ring to prove contracts are temporary but screenshots are forever.
Nyesom Dwala
Nigeria’s legal establishment has reportedly discovered a new qualification for conference speaking: sufficient comments-section warfare. Law students are now advised to replace case law with ring light, because relevance has entered the bar.
Nyesom Dwala
From “fake news” to forensic thread-reading in under 12 minutes, Nigerian Twitter has perfected its arrest-response protocol. Our columnist maps the timeline’s sacred journey from denial to memes to forgetting completely.
Nyesom Dwala
As Nigeria’s caption-based economy continues to outperform GDP, experts warn that any lifestyle requiring three jets, five borrowed watches and one unnamed “import-export” business may deserve small second look.
Nyesom Dwala
As Peller and Jarvis prepare to say “I do,” Nigerians are preparing to say everything else. From livestream economists to comment-section detectives, tomorrow’s wedding is expected to briefly replace fuel prices as the nation’s biggest concern.
Nyesom Dwala
Experts say Lagos traffic has outgrown the five stages of grief, adding Prayer, Generator Fumes and Just Japa for commuters who left “early” in 2019 and are still approaching CMS.
Nyesom Dwala
In Nigeria’s accountability ecosystem, blame is not avoided, it is professionally redistributed. These six job titles offer the perfect mix of authority, plausible deniability, and enough committee meetings to survive any scandal untouched.
Nyesom Dwala
From immortal potholes to ‘coming soon’ flyovers and uncles permanently japa-ing next year, these Nigerian institutions have shown more continuity than any manifesto. At this point, the pothole deserves a constituency allowance.
Nyesom Dwala
Experts warn Nigeria’s mental health sector may soon be replaced by comment sections, where one post can summon 400 therapists, two prophets, seven lawyers and an uncle with lion DP to diagnose your trauma before your data finishes.
Nyesom Dwala
Forget talent, strategy or home training. This essential guide reveals how to win BBNaija Season 11 with tears, ship management, kitchen coups and enough camera awareness to make your village people request a PR contract.
Nyesom Dwala
Economists say the N1 million aso ebi may briefly rescue the economy, as banks prepare wedding loans and Lagos traffic braces for “Peller Junction.” Uninvited Nigerians have also demanded voting rights in the marriage after emotionally contributing to the budget online.
Nyesom Dwala
A fictional study says Nigerians can now turn one headline into 14 hours of constitutional analysis, economic forecasting and family WhatsApp warfare—without the inconvenience of opening the link.
Nyesom Dwala
Nigeria has been rocked by the shocking discovery that the oldest Gen Zs are now 30 and asking serious questions like “how much is rent?” and “which HMO is affordable?” Social media is in denial, but adulthood has finally tapped the generation that once believed age was a social construct.
Nyesom Dwala
Nigerians should stop complaining and start appreciating the premium subscription service they call a country. Where else can fuel queues, NEPA’s hourly cameo and supermarket feasibility studies all come bundled as character development?
Reuben Datti
Scientists have reportedly solved Nigeria’s survival mystery: the average citizen no longer runs on food, power, or public services, but on one renewable energy source; “it will be better.” Government is said to be considering classifying hope as a mineral deposit.
Nyesom Dwala
We keep declaring Nigeria the greatest country on earth, then privately asking strangers on LinkedIn if their company is “currently sponsoring skilled workers.” At this point, even patriotism seems to depend on whether the embassy has replied.
Reuben Datti
After years of surviving traffic, fuel queues, stubborn banks and the daily emotional damage of Nigerian life, one man has concluded that the country needs a National Day of Rest. Not a public holiday for celebration — a recovery programme for people who wake up tired and remain available to suffering.
Reuben Datti
If Nigeria is serious about accountability, transparency and results, it should stop appointing politicians and hand the cabinet to Nigerian mothers. They already run tighter budgets, better intelligence, and stricter discipline than half the ministries combined.
Reuben Datti
Researchers say Nigerians have finally confirmed what WhatsApp has been warning us for years: “I’m on my way” is not a location, it is a mood. In many cases, it simply means the person has seen your call and chosen peace over accuracy.
Reuben Datti
After years of research from inside danfos, I can confirm Lagos traffic is not a traffic jam — it is a sentient being with plans for your life. It knows exactly when you’re late, and it only clears the road when you have nowhere important to go.
Reuben Datti
After the family’s 2GB mysteriously vanished before lunch, a national investigation has begun into the person who was “just scrolling.” Authorities suspect the culprit may have also updated 17 apps, backed up 20,000 photos and watched TikTok in 4K using church-level confidence.
Reuben Datti
Mental health experts have named the Nigerian family WhatsApp group one of the country’s toughest institutions, just behind planning a wedding and renewing a passport. Escape, they say, requires either a miracle, a broken phone, or pretending your WhatsApp has been “hanging” since 2022.
Reuben Datti
Mental health experts have warned of a new family ailment sweeping Nigeria: the stress of becoming the relative everyone thinks owns an oil block because you once bought shawarma without asking for the price. Symptoms include muted WhatsApp groups, urgent bank alerts, and sudden Christmas rice consultations.
Reuben Datti
